So hopefully Mom never reads this blog because aside from the "STOP COOKING YOU'RE GOING TO FAIL MEDICAL SCHOOL AND DROP OUT AND WASTE OUR MONEY", she would definitely be unhappy if she found out I was spending my time growing my own Thai Basil seedlings from scratch. I mean literally from scratch. As you can see, I've even designed my own herb "pots" - yogurt containers with holes cut out of the bottom. It's surprising how low-maintenace basil can be, and this time I listened to Dad's advice and made sure not to plant the seedlings too close together.
Seeing the sprouts got me really excited, but it also made me very contemplative of the recent occurrences around me. I've always tried to make this blog specifically oriented towards cooking (none of that emo-depression crap), but lately I've been thinking of California and the memories I have of the past chapters in my life. When I first came to medical school, I promised myself to turn over a new leaf - a clean, blank slate devoid of the messes that I had made in the past. But sometimes, more often than I'd like to admit, memories rise again, like bleed-throughs from a pen or ominous bubbles on an otherwise smooth surface. It's often these disturbances that give me conflicts over the little things in my life. Opportunities come by my way, opportunities that make me want to take chances and live carpe diem, but always, in the back of my mind, a part of me is always warily holding back.
Well, a promise is a promise, and I really have to let go of the past. I don't mean all of the past, of course. Lately, I've been a little homesick (this morning, I heard California Girls on the radio, which got me a little depressed) but with all the phone calls and facebook posts I'm getting from my friends back home, I really couldn't ask for anything more. How could I possibly let THEM go? Plus, the people here are so incredibly awesome that I really have no right to complain. But there are definitely marks I need to erase from my mind - so like the little sprouted babies on my study table, I've got to let go and just start over.